French Fried Thighs Meet Dinky Seat

Why the hell is everything at the arena junk food?!

People who know me, know that I spend at least 30 seconds each hour, every hour, of every day complaining about the Alien that lives in my stomach. I look at food and I want to die. Same if I smell it. But I want it so, so bad! So just to get to my seat this week for the two games I was lucky enough (and stupid enough to pay for) to go to, I had to walk by so much lard-based, synthetic cheese product nonsense. I couldn't help myself. I got the junk food. Then I got to my seat and ate it while trying to keep my eyes on the rink.

It wasn't until I had been sitting in the seat a few hours on Thursday that I realized: hey, this is one dinky-ass seat! I have a booty, but I fit in it. BUT Americans are getting bigger everyday. Apparently we have a whole epidemic of fat people, I mean fatness. There's no logic in this: overwhelming access to junk food and little little (I mean it, little) seats. How many of the kids at the games now will still be able to come when they're adults and all porky from the french fry cups?

That said, I saw something on Tuesday that I must share! I had never EVER seen this before and I've lived 29 years. Here's the situation, you have fries or something else like it where you want a lot of ketchup (or similarly thick condiment) to dip it in. You look around and all you spot are those ridiculous little paper cups which hold about 1 fry's worth of condiment. Grab a soda lid and turn it upside down. Now you have a big shallow dish which can hold nearly enough ketchup/mustard for one of those french fry cups. Some people may be laughing, but I've never seen that. You sports people are crafty!

Stark Sands Fan Community